Day 21

Woke up around 8ish feeling much better then the day before, but still not 100%. It was fine though, nothing I couldn't fight through. Grabbed my Ellen D flag and said to myself "today is going to be a good day". We all jumped into a couple of Tuk Tuk's and headed to the market to pick up a ton of food. So much food that the three Tuk Tuk's were full, why you ask, well because we were headed out to one of the dumps in Cambodia where many people live there without homes, without food, and with many dreams that may never come true.

On our way to the dump we prepared ourselves for bad, we knew it wasn't going to be easy and what we were about to see would change us forever. When we arrived there we knew there was no way we could have prepared ourselves for this. It was much worse then what we ever imagined. Children running with open arms as fast as they could so they could eat food they haven't eaten in a while and would probably not eat for a while after this. So many children just running and women with babies, even pregnant women just hoping for something to keep them going just one more day.

We had bread, and a bunch of different fruit. People were pushing because they knew they had to get in there because there is always that chance of not getting any food, it could run out and they end up empty handed. We gave each person a small portion, I wanted to give more, but I knew if we did that then others would not get any. So many children without medical care, and this one child I will never be able to get out of my head her eye was swollen over and puss was dripping from her eye. She couldn't be any older then 7 and you could already tell she may never see the age of 10. So many children with swollen bellies from malnutrition, so many mothers just trying to feed their children. It was so sad it was hard to be there. I was giving out bread, at one point I looked and there were only three peices of bread left and over a dozen people still needing food. I looked at Amanda and said "I can't do this, I can't pick and choose who eats and who doesn't" I had tears in my eyes, she told me I had to and that I could do it and no matter what whoever I chose it would be for the best. This was one of the hardest moments in my life. I looked around with 20 some people begging me to give them the bread, I chose a pregnant women because if she dies due to starvation then her baby dies as well. I chose the smallest child because he was being pushed around the most and I knew it was probably hard for him to get food everyday since he was the smallest. And I chose a very sick child who I knew would probably be one of his last meals. I will never be sure if I made the right choice, but to me I think it was the best I could make.

After the food was gone we walked around the dump sitre seeing what type of living conditions these people lived in. Most places just had something to cover them from rain, but the bad thing is when it rains the dump floods so they can't even stay in their homes when it rains. We talked to some of the kids and then jumped back in our Tuk Tuk's to head back to the guest house. Everyone was silent until we decided not to be sad, but to be happy since all the people living at the dump site were happy about life so they were not asking us to feel bad for them, just to be happy that they are still going strong. Which is when the water fight started. It was girls agaisnt guys and we were throwing water back and forth from Tuk Tuk to Tuk Tuk. When we finally got back to the guest house we were all wet and discusting.

Got a shower and had some free time to internet or whatever we wanted. Eli and I decided to go for a walk around and we found some interesting things such as a bunch of people playing these massive drums. Watched them for a while and then headed back to meet group. Met up with the group and went out for supper together. After supper we went to S.C.A.O orphanage to have a meeting with them to find out about the rpoject we would be starting with them the next day. Met some of the children and played around with them while we were there. Once the meeting was over we headed back to the guest house and went to bed because it was going to be an early morning the next day to start building a school for the orphanage.